25 June 2005

The Neckarvergnügen, part 2.

You may be asking, "part 2? Where was part 1?". Well, as Jeannette pointed out, what I have been calling the Necakrfest is really the Neckarvergnügen. The real Neckarfest happens only once every four years. Like the world cup. Or the olympics. Or the US presidential election. I suppose that confusing the Neckarfest with the Neckarvergnügen would be like confusing the olympics with the world cup. Or the US presidential election.

Anyway... Last night we checked out the first night of the Vergnügen. There were several cheesy bands on the various stages, we sampled a beer or two and dipped our hot feet into the cold water.

One thing I saw that was interesting was these two kids beating on each other with inflatible baseball-bat shaped thingies that bear a striking resemblance to the flag of the U.S.A. Why would they be selling these in Germany? Why not sell them with the yellow, black & red colors of the German flag? Then I thought a bit more about it, and realized that there is only one purpose for these things. They look like baseball bats (roughly), but they would be so ineffective for baseball that using one for that would be like trying to empty the ocean with a tea cup. So that's not it. But wait, maybe for a really small kid, they could be used as a flotation device. But what parent will trust their toddler to that? I postulate that the only purpose they serve is for kids to whack each other without the chance of injury. That probably explains why it is covered with the "Stars & Stripes" rather than the ... er... whatever the Germans call their flag. Let's use the U.S. flag on our aggression stick! Why not, the US is now a nation known for attacking other nations without provocation or direct cause. It makes sense. But hey, I want to spin this in a good light, so I have come up with a good name for this toy. I call it the "anti-terrorism truncheon of freedom and democracy".


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